The worst day.

I cannot begin to fathom how much things have changed in the last 24 hours... Last night I went to bed dreading the idea of getting up to go to the dr this morning i had to be there at 9 and i have had such a hard time waking up recently.

This morning I got up at 7:30 and got ready for my appointment. I had my normal (high risk, but normal) OB appointment this morning. I got to the hospital for the appointment and had to hunt for 30 minutes for parking. I was pretty irritated that I was late because there was absolutely no parking.

I went in to the office apologizing profusely for being late. They were very understanding (which is fortunate because a lot of times on post they are not.) and checked me in. I got called back and they did all the normal vital signs and weight and such. And then the dr came in. He measured me and then did an ultrasound because that is the standard procedure when you have twins.

We were talking about my weight gain (which was right on track! He was saying how well I was carrying) while he did the ultrasound. Suddenly, he got this funny look on his face, turned the monitor away from me and keeps talking, but seems distracted.

I knew then that something was wrong.

He turned the monitor back to me and says well here is one, and she was moving around and I could feel that. And he says and here is the other, not moving. My heart stopped, but he didn't say the baby was gone so I asked if he was just sleeping. I have never seen a doctor want to cry before, and I knew. He said no, he has no heartbeat. I completely lost it.

He then told me that they had to do an ultrasound and bloodwork which is routine and that the head of the department, colonel spooner would be in to speak with me. She was really sweet about it all...

The most I remember from that point is a bunch of crying, phone calls to my husbands unit (because he is still deployed) and a bunch of people hugging me. The col. Spooner took me in for the ultrasound. Her biggest concern was the growth of the remaining baby, and If she was going to survive.

She told me that her heartbeat is strong, and her growth is perfect from the ultrasound done 3 weeks ago. Then she measured little boy. He has had no significant growth since the last ultrasound. Which means that I lost him either 3 weeks ago. Or he didn't grow and that's what happened. I had no pain, no spotting, no bleeding, still gaining weight, everything seemed fine to me.

At that point she said that she was going to do a transvaginal ultrasound to be on the safe side and check my cervix. She had no reason to be worried that something was up, she was just being thorough.

At that point she told me that I am dialated to 2cm. I freaked!! If I thought I lost it before, this was nothing. She told me that they are now admitting me to the hospital because they need to see what is going on. Their thought is that my body is trying to expel little boy. which is bad because he was baby #2. Meaning he is second in line to be born. He cannot come out unless little girl comes out first.

Needless to say, Im in a pretty bad place right now. I really just needed a place to get my thoughts straight. I have been unable to think or process any of it. I just want to melt and disappear. The sent a red cross message overseas for hubby and he should be home late tomorrow. I'm hoping that I can keep from having a total melt down until he is here.

5 Things I have learned being a member of Parenting Sites....

This is all in fun, Mostly, But I was trying to help someone out today when it came to a high fever, and I practically got stoned for following a doctor's advice when it comes to Payten. So listen to the things I learned while Being a member of some of the "parenting websites" floating around out there....

1. Every Doctor is STUPID! If a doctor tells you something it Must be wrong! If you find someone that actually listens to their Doctor, BASH THEM! They are more wrong than Doctors! STONE THE DOCTOR FOLLOWERS!

2.There is no such thing as Opinions! Everything that someone says Is A FACT! If you disagree with me, You are WRONG! CONFORM YOU EVIL MONKEY!

3. Punishing a child Of ANY age with ANY form of punishment is ABUSE you Lump of  Lard! You wash your child's Mouth out? You deserve 50 Years! Time out is CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT and How DARE you do that to an Ornery child?? SPANKING? PUT HER TO DEATH!

4. Every person you meet is either completely stupid or is trying to trick you into hurting your child! The only way around it is to be a Hermit! Conform today!!!

5. If you are a Drama Whore and only post to create problems, People LOVE YOU! If you have a Serious question about parenting, You are Bashed or Completely Ignored!

Yay for Babies!!!

So I had my Ultrasound today! heres the news....
First, It has been discovered that I have two Placentas, So no surgery for me! Yay! And that Means that they are Fraternal twins.... so they are not Identical.... Also we found out the gender of the babies!!

Baby A is a....

GIRL!!!!! 

Her name is going to be Emmalynn Jade

Baby B is a..... 

BOY!!!!! 

His name is going to be Elijah Matias! 

We are so super excited about these Kiddos!! And now here are the Cute ones....

Elijah in Profile

Emmalynn in Profile

Emmalynn Says "HI!"

Elijah is waving at you!! 

Been a Busy Week!

So this week has been an extremely busy one! I swear every night when I get home I fall into bed and just pass out until my little boxers wake me! I thought I would take the few spare minutes that I have this evening and Update with Pics of the belly and (if it works) the most recent Ultrasound video! I feel like I have been growing more than usual, and I might not be going crazy on that, Most of my clothes do not fit! Im having to stretch them (Literally and figuratively) to fit. the few Long sleeve shirts I have that do Fit Im having to wash over and over to be able to use them, and the ones that Almost fit are getting stretched! So here is a really good Belly shot!

Of course its edited, Have I mentioned that I Love Instagram? haha

Most recently, I was put on a heart monitor to make sure that everything was going according to plan with the babies and that they were not putting a strain on my heart. Everything seems to be fine at this point, But Im telling you, that monitor was Itchy as Heck!!! 

This is me in my monitor right after I got it. 

They put me int he monitor on Wednesday, and I got it removed on Thursday. It left this horrible nasty rash that included blisters. Thankfully it has Mostly gone away now! On Thursday, I had to go to the hospital and get it taken off and then I had to Prep and Plan for the FRG potluck that we had at the house on Friday morning. There was some house cleaning to get done, because I have been sick lately and had a hard time doing anything! And of course, I had to bake the coffee cake for the potluck. Friday, My little break-dancers had me up at 5:30 am. I had to get up for the Potluck, but still rather annoying! I got all the last minute stuff done and ended up making cinnamon rolls too because I needed to run the Oven to help warm the house! It was in the 30's that morning! Im really proud of my cake, Everyone loved it, and I have even had a few people ask me for my recipe! Seriously made my day. 

Orange Pumpkin Coffee Cake

Next Wednesday, I have another ultrasound to find both placentas, as we have only been able to find one so far. Hopefully we will be able to see the sex of the babies at that point! I will keep you Posted!! 

Stupid thing isn't wanting to Upload the Video, so I will try to do it later in its own post! 

Dr Appointment Update

So I went to the Doctor Yesterday, and Yes, there are still two babies in there. There really isnt much to say about it though, I have an ultrasound appointment on Wednesday of next week. they are hunting for the Placenta(s) because they have only ever found one. if they only have one placenta, that means they are Identical, and thats Cool. But If I only have one, I have to drive to Houston to have it lasered in half. I am not looking forward to that! Heres hoping they are Fraternal twins!!